I remember anger arrows hurled at my father for his foot-tapping habit. Unaware of the repetitious movement, he appeared confused and borderline angry when confronted. I strove to contain my nervous or anxious morse code tap release habits, presenting in the SurfaceWorld as upright and stiff. But then, Teenagedom happened, and I dug into the InnerRealm to uncover Anger, which I wielded with a clumsy but proud flourish. Unfortunately, I also encountered Depression, which is the next layer down. Whereas Anger can feel strong, it typically is a Coverup for some form of insecurity.
Stirring the giant vat of Depression Stew blocking the Path Toward Core, I blended clumps of Severe Suppression with Sad Striation. My foot tapped a Thwrted Release Code, and I thought about my father. Was he trying to say something? I cultivated the Foot Tap, actively listening to the rhythm vibrationally intensifying until I felt my body fill up with electric signals, revealing where my body held onto Habitual ShutDown Patterns. I added a varied Playlist and explored expanding the foot tap to include both feet. I discovered that the many Personas shifting through my Mental Command Center and body all tapped their feet differently. Anger sends signals up the front of the body, bulky in the shoulders; Sadness signals are like smoke smudges, and Depression foot taps heavy, draining mud.
